Dear Haijin, visitors and travelers,
As you all (maybe) know I am writing our CDHK feuilleton "Wandering Spirit", about the life of Yozakura, the unknown haiku poet. Recently I started writing the new episode in which I describe Yozakura's first year as an apprentice of Basho. In that episode Basho and Yozakura start to create a chained verse, a renga. Yozakura has the honor to write the starting verse, or hokku.
at dawn
birds sing their songs
dewdrops shimmer
© Yozakura
Basho has to write the second verse (or waki) of two lines and he comes up with this:
cherry blossoms bloom again
shelter for young sparrows
© Basho
Yozakura has to write the third verse (or daisan) of three lines, but he struggles with, because he has to use the "moon" or a reference to "moon" in it. Yozakura wishes to ask you all for your help with this. Can you help him with the 3rd verse (daisan)?
 |
| spring moon |
Share your third verse with him through the comment field. He will choose the third verse he likes the most and as it is your verse? Than he grants you the opportunity to be featured in a Wandering Spirit Special (something like our CDHK Special).
Of course I have given it a try too, so here is my third verse to help Yozakura:
fragile beauty
makes the night mysterious
she ... the one I love
© Chèvrefeuille
I hope you like this challenge and I am looking forward to your responses. You can respond through the comment field until October 25th 10:00 PM (CET). Have fun!
Shimmering night sky
ReplyDeleteCasting her spell on water
Ebbing and flowing.
then at sundown
ReplyDeleteas the song birds slumber
a hawk in moonbeams
namaste
JzB
Hello, here's mine: http://smellthecoffeeweb.blog/2017/10/19/wandering-spirit/ or
ReplyDeletethis :
hues ebb and flow
under a lunar steady gaze
as night sounds awaken
__ I remember thinking (70 years ago) the night rain would fill the arch moon's cup; well, here below I tried. Smiles. _m
ReplyDeletearch moon
rain drips from its tip
low most
misspelling: low mist. _m
Deletedewdrops shimmer...
ReplyDeletein a thousand moments
the spring moon
the moon in my sake
ReplyDeleteweighs heavily
tonight
oops -- please delete my previous submission! I changed one word in the poem. Please put this one up instead (thank you!):
ReplyDeletepurple hanging light
illuminating branches
sensei waits for me
http://cactushaiku.com/wandering-spirit-challenge-yozakuras-daisan/
A very nice challege, Kristjaan. Here is my daisan:
ReplyDeletecool veil of mist
covers her luminous face
modest moon
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeletesearching
ReplyDeletefor soul connection
invisible moon
© Humbird
https://adaspoetryalcove2.wordpress.com/2017/10/19/wandering-spirit-challenge/
ReplyDeletethe pale moon hangs
still fresh against the sky
trailing morning glories
story time
ReplyDeletespring moon ask again
for a sakura .
my humble daisan
songs fade in moonlight
ReplyDeletefall evening closes curtains
on sparrow's nest
Wow guys and girls what a joy to read all of your responses on Yozakura's question. Will not be easy to choose the right daisan.
ReplyDelete